A feast

I went to a party last night, the housewarming of a friend of my boyfriends. She’s apparently well known in their social circle as being a good cook, so everyone was looking forward to what was coming that night. The attitude of this group towards food was refreshing.

My family and friends always tend to casually saunter towards food without any rush. Without wanting to look like the person who had no self control, who couldn’t stave off their natural urge to just eat when they’re hungry or when they’re presented with food (because that’s the point of a dinner party, no?). Even at big events that are centered around food like Thanksgiving, it feels like no one wants to be first in line. I don’t know if this is based on politeness or not wanting to look like the pig who couldn’t show any restraint, but I know my own personal experience is that I didn’t want to look like the pig.

This was different though. This was amazing. As this girl brought out dish after delicious dish the crowd clamoured to the table. Every time it happened it came as a surprise to me. I had picked sub-optimal seating, on the floor near the table, not knowing what I was getting myself into. I knew that it would get crowded with people coming to get food, but I didn’t know that I would be risking getting trampled as people stampeded over to see what this new delight was.

I couldn’t stop my old habits, restraining myself and only trying just a bit so as not to look like the fat one in the room who couldn’t control herself. This was completely ridiculous considering the excitement that everyone else was showing over the simple event of food being placed on the table. I realized how silly this was even as I thought it, but I couldn’t bring myself to do something that felt so unnatural and go back for seconds. I sat there and thought about how fantastic it was that people could just eat, without judgement on themselves or others, they could eat as much or as little as they wanted and enjoy every single bite.

This is my new goal for when I go back home for Christmas. The majority of my family isn’t particularly religious, so the point of the holiday is about the family, the friends, and the food. So instead of holding back and hoping that someone gets in line first, I’m going to dive right in and start. And I’m going to take as much or as little of everything that I want, because this is a meal that only happens once a year, so why can’t we live it up and enjoy it a little?

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Just something to think about

“Consider Hollywood’s current It Girl, Keira Knightley. Knightley has a body mass that places her in the second percentile of the population. If her weight were to deviate as radically in the other direction – in other words if she were in the 98th percentile of body mass – she would weigh approximately 300 pounds.

Yet Knightley is presented by our media-industrial complex as a completely natural object of male desire, while men attracted to 300-pound women are considered to be in the grip of a bizarre fetish.”

Paul Campos

I don’t think Campos is saying that there’s anything wrong with being attracted to women of either size (he is the author of the the Diet Myth after all), but just how skewed it is that we can place someone on one end of the spectrum on a pedestal, but someone on the other end is deemed completely unacceptable.

Will a body ever be enough?

In an effort to learn to love my body more, I’ve given up a lot of mainstream media. I don’t currently own a tv or buy magazines, and I try to pay as little attention to advertisements as I can while walking down the street. I haven’t yet given up the internet, but for the most part I spend my time on websites and blogs that are trying to promote positive body image and less time on websites like Cosmo. Because of this I miss out on a lot of the most appalling things that media is doing today, but some of these blogs I read wake me up to the horrific reality that is modern media.

While reading through the blog on About Face I discovered the recent scandal involving some photographs taken of model Karlie Kloss by photographer Greg Kadel. The intent of my post isn’t to call into question the size of the model or the intentions of the photographer, but rather to call into question the actions of Numéro magazine.

Magazines have turned into a double-edged sword where it seems like absolutely no body type is good enough. It starts with only choosing women who they deem to be almost thin enough, and then they photoshop them to be thinner. And now, they have found this elusive body, the body who is on its own actually “acceptable” and is able to make an appearance in a magazine just the size it is, but the reality of it is too offensive to spare even her from photoshop.

Karlie Kloss is dramatically thin, and the reality of that means that her rib cage is prominently visible in the photographs taken by Greg Kadel. Because of this, Numéro magazine went to the effort of photoshopping the photograph so that her ribs were no longer visible. This possibly frustrates me even more than photoshopping a model to make her appear thinner. This woman has somehow achieved the “ideal” body type for this publication, a waist that is finally thin enough that it needs no retouching, and yet she still isn’t good enough. Somehow magazines want a model with this “ideal” body type, but the reality of that body type isn’t something they want to show, and so even this drastically thin model is told that she too, isn’t good enough.